I love to have arguments with my own mind. The heart & mind are two things that often have conflicts. Whenever I ponder over something, I make sure that every side was justified before coming to a conclusion. Sometimes, I become so tired of arguing with myself (especially at night) that I finally stop to sleep but when I wake up the argument will resume.
Just recently, while reading the comments in some of the Google+ posts on my wall, a thought occurred to me. People are so vain that sometimes it comes to the point that we spend more on vanity that on necessity. Some people are so fed up with “tips on how to be accepted by society” even though the real answers just lie inside themselves. You have to wear this kind of make-up, wear this type of clothing, eat this kind of food, speak this language, do this type of activities, wear this scent, do that, be this, buy that, etc. The list never ends.
On the other hand, if you do these things that the “experts” claimed that will make you “better”, then you’ll definitely become better in the eyes of the others that are doing that just like that. It’s like a butterfly. A caterpillar undergoes metamorphosis to be a beautiful creature and although it doesn’t resemble its old self anymore, it was still a caterpillar. I’ve seen many changes that turned out great. Maybe because you really have to change in order to improve. But drastic change isn’t always good. You may lost what you truly treasure in the process and though the results may be greater than what you’ve lost, it doesn’t work all the time. Sometimes, it doesn’t turn out to be good. Because not all that glitters are gold.
It’s like wearing our IDs: yes it’s your own identification but if you’re not wearing the same logo on your ID or not wearing it the same way it has to be wear, then you cannot be admitted unless you change and be like everybody else. And sometimes it’s true that when you do these “tips”, you really become better. But that depends. If you’re comfortable wearing your artificial self than your natural self, then you’re good.
There are just so many labels we have to wear just to be “in”. And I must admit I was once a victim of vanity that in the end, I stopped because I realized that I was becoming who I am not. I don’t want to live in the way others want me to live. I am the ruler of my own life. I don’t care what these celebs do to look gorgeous; I am completely contented with the way I look! And that’s when I started to stopped wearing the clothes that everybody else wears, stopped putting much make-up just to look like this celeb, and start to live the way I want to live, comfortably. I sleep well at night. I don’t give a damn what the boys think when I wear jeans & snickers. I don’t go to salon now. I eat whatever I want to eat. I wear my favorite perfume, and sometimes I go without it. I am a cast-away and I don’t care.
Be yourself. You don’t need to change the way you look, act, or speak just to be seen. You don’t need to try hard just to be accepted. Just do what you do in the best way that you can. And I do believe that change is a constant thing, I just don’t believe that all changes are good. Sometimes you have to remain yourself because that’s how you will truly understand your own. You have to remain even just a bit of what you are now so that you’ll not end up having identity crisis (the same thing that we called “finding ourselves” though it’s just lying beneath our labels) later. Things may come & go. Things may change, but remember that you only live once and you have endless possibilities ahead of you. You can do everything, but don’t let yourself go beyond your grasp. Just don’t get lost.